EVERYTHING IS GETTING TO ME LATELY.
It's saddening and annoying and aggravating and I have quite the headache now.
What am I supposed to do? I'm trying desperately to look at the world through rose colored glasses. But my glasses are just prescribed as -7.5 in each eye. And I don't have contacts to wear anything else as of now. Because I'm broke.
You know how they say you should vent to a friend, but no longer that fifteen minutes? I think that's my problem. I vent on and off all day. And a lot of what I'm complaining about, I don't even quite know how it bothers me.
But the worst part (or maybe the best part, I don't know) about all of this is the fact that I feel desperately like telling my 'best friends' how it fucking is. I already wrote one girl a really mean letter, but I didn't send it to her because it wasn't worth it, she's out of my life now and that's all that I needed; just to get the fuck away from that poisoned relationship.
But let me just make a quick list. For every bad thing I list, I have to list a good thing. That's legitimate, right?
1. My teacher Mrs. Cox? Is a total bitch, and I'm fucking sick of her. In the halls on Fridays, we normally have music in the hallways via the loud speaker, but as a senior 'prank' we played live music and carted around an organ. AND SHE YELLED AT US! After we got permission from the principal. UGHHGHGHGHGHHHHH.
1*. I recently wrote a pretty awesome essay on the psychological development of Harry Potter.
2. I live in Wisconsin, and the only person who actually drove speed limit today was a FIB. I almost died.
2*. It is a beautiful dayyyyyy!
3. Jade and I went to go take photos at a boat landing, and some douche bag yelled at us for parking in a parking spot. IT'S A FUCKING PARKING SPOT, GET THE HELL OVER IT! He wasn't even parked there, he had a better spot open for him.
3*. Jade and I got to see some of our elementary school friends we haven't seen in years, and it made her really happy, and I was incredibly glad to see her smile for the first time in a few days.
4. I have a constant anxious feeling in my gut lately, and I have to do a lot of laundry, put oil in my car, and I think probably just get the hell out of town for a day. Or something.
4*. I have moles on my belly that make my belly look sexay.
5. I'm super scared to even put on a swimsuit in public, because I think I look gross. Adding onto the gross factor, I have to wear my glasses lately, and I'm breaking out.
5*. I got to hang out with Autumn last night, and we watched Amelie! And I really enjoyed it :D
6. I am interested or at least physically attracted to several boys, all of which are completely unattainable. Mostly because a) I don't actually know them (long story for another blog) or b) because the 'time' isn't right. Because the time is never right. because I'm a coward.
6*. I have a wonderful immediate family who loves me.
7. My dad isn't coming to my graduation ceremony. I don't want him to, and I gave his ticket away, but I have a feeling my grandmother will give him hers anyway. I just don't want to deal with any of that.
7*. I have gotten sufficient sleep this weekend, to the point where I woke up at 9:20 am this morning, all by myself. :3
8. I think I have paranoid schizophrenia. I fell asleep on the couch the other night with a knife on the coffee table next to me because I thought there was somebody in my basement. Or else, I'm just fucking bat shit crazy, or manic depressive with a hint of PMD, or something.
8*. I've got nothin'.
Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad dayyyyysssssss.
