I've been sick for the past few days, and it's really tiresome. I have so much to do, and more makeup work is not helping. I did, however, get lucky and manage to stay home sick on a day that didn't particularly matter.
I'm so ready to be done. And I know it's only going to get worse from here on out, with more homework, the ACT coming up, AP tests, and that scholarship audition... I really need to start practicing more. Like my scales- I'm supposed to be comfortable in the major, natural minor, harmonic minor and melodic minor three octave scales and arpeggios from G to C#. I'm really really really really not comfortable in most any of them. Dammmmnnnnnnn ittttttttt.
Plus, with being sick, I'm not really eating. Which is bad, because I need to gain weight, not lose it. I've been quivering all day. And I don't just want to mow on Oreos until I'm healthy enough to donate blood. I want some balance in my diet... but it's so hard to find vegetables worth liking. I'm warming up to them.
Song of the Day:
George Gerswhin's 'An American in Paris'
(I played an abridged version of this piece in eighth grade for Middle Level State Honors Orchestra, and loved it automatically. It was the piece that introduced me to subtle jazz-classical music and to Mr. Gershwin in general, and I'm so glad I got the opportunity to play it, even if it wasn't the real thing.)
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Friday, March 11, 2011
Shock, Awe, and Aquafina
Today I found out one of my friends who I never see anymore got into some trouble. Like, serious, moral-dilemma trouble. And it made me wonder if I should laugh, or if I should cry on her behalf like that freak who did the youtube video "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!"
I didn't realize that so many teenagers don't really understand the importance of decision making, or of moral behavior. Yes, we're young, and we should treasure it while we can, but am I going to be the one who missed out on so much, just because I didn't want to get into big time trouble?
And when did everybody become so dishonest? So manipulative? So... uncaring and unsympathetic? I know I'm not the only one who thinks telling a lie is a bad thing. I know I'm not the only one who feels like they don't know which path to choose, or which influence to be taken by. I know I'm not the only one who wants to show that I actually understand others, but just sits because I feel like my help won't be accepted. Damn. The world is so...closed off.
Revelation!
I am indeed shocked and awed my friend, who I used to be so close with, would get into this sort of trouble. I'm shocked that other friends have had to deal with death, with abandonment, with heartbreak, or with down-right hate at such a young age. It's sad. The world isn't a bad place, but Pandora's box seems as though it was just tossed aside and forgotten by the young. Maybe I'm just finally entering a new stage of 'growing up.'
On the upswing, however! I finally felt creative for the first time in a long time today. I wrote a poem in the style of Emily Dickenson with ease about my blue feet, and I wrote a chord progression for what seems to be the beginnings to a really cool piano sonata/concerto/whatever. It made me feel good to release myself into the music- I feel like a constructive individual again. So, although I was shocked and awed by a stunning revelation, my day wasn't so bad.
Piece of the Day:
George Gershwin's 'Rhapsody in Blue,' performed by Leonard Bernstein (the god)
I didn't realize that so many teenagers don't really understand the importance of decision making, or of moral behavior. Yes, we're young, and we should treasure it while we can, but am I going to be the one who missed out on so much, just because I didn't want to get into big time trouble?
And when did everybody become so dishonest? So manipulative? So... uncaring and unsympathetic? I know I'm not the only one who thinks telling a lie is a bad thing. I know I'm not the only one who feels like they don't know which path to choose, or which influence to be taken by. I know I'm not the only one who wants to show that I actually understand others, but just sits because I feel like my help won't be accepted. Damn. The world is so...closed off.
Revelation!
I am indeed shocked and awed my friend, who I used to be so close with, would get into this sort of trouble. I'm shocked that other friends have had to deal with death, with abandonment, with heartbreak, or with down-right hate at such a young age. It's sad. The world isn't a bad place, but Pandora's box seems as though it was just tossed aside and forgotten by the young. Maybe I'm just finally entering a new stage of 'growing up.'
On the upswing, however! I finally felt creative for the first time in a long time today. I wrote a poem in the style of Emily Dickenson with ease about my blue feet, and I wrote a chord progression for what seems to be the beginnings to a really cool piano sonata/concerto/whatever. It made me feel good to release myself into the music- I feel like a constructive individual again. So, although I was shocked and awed by a stunning revelation, my day wasn't so bad.
Piece of the Day:
George Gershwin's 'Rhapsody in Blue,' performed by Leonard Bernstein (the god)
Thursday, March 10, 2011
I like to watch my water boil, just to defy the impossible.
So, I've been thinking up quotes today (that are worth quoting me on) and I've gotten two. I'm very tired, so they may not be as good as I think they are but. The first one is the title of this particular entry. The second one is as follows:
"I'd rather be blind and feel the sun's warmth than see darkness all around me."
I wish I could live by that quote. The truth is, lately it's hard to try to see past the bad stuff. I know it's that way for a lot of people this time of year. But I'm really tired of dealing with it. We'll see how things work out with a medication.
But that's not my point. um. my point is.
I honestly have no idea. What is the point of a blog anyway? It's not like a journal- it's too impersonal and too public. It's more personal, though, than a facebook or a myspace. I suppose that I'm having trouble finding the gray space in between the black and white.
Song/Piece of the Day:
(Frederic Chopin, Scherzo in B minor for Piano, Opus 31)
"I'd rather be blind and feel the sun's warmth than see darkness all around me."
I wish I could live by that quote. The truth is, lately it's hard to try to see past the bad stuff. I know it's that way for a lot of people this time of year. But I'm really tired of dealing with it. We'll see how things work out with a medication.
But that's not my point. um. my point is.
I honestly have no idea. What is the point of a blog anyway? It's not like a journal- it's too impersonal and too public. It's more personal, though, than a facebook or a myspace. I suppose that I'm having trouble finding the gray space in between the black and white.
Song/Piece of the Day:
(Frederic Chopin, Scherzo in B minor for Piano, Opus 31)
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Damn.
Okay. Well.
It's hard to try to start something like this out. I've always been bad at beginnings.
Ends can be worse though. But I'm one of those people who takes change and cradles it in her hands and.
Whatever. Yeah.
So. Um?
I am.not going to give a formal introduction. Instead I will post a link to a piece. That I like. Feel free to enjoy.
(Saint Saens's 'Carnival of the Animals')
-Paige.
It's hard to try to start something like this out. I've always been bad at beginnings.
Ends can be worse though. But I'm one of those people who takes change and cradles it in her hands and.
Whatever. Yeah.
So. Um?
I am.not going to give a formal introduction. Instead I will post a link to a piece. That I like. Feel free to enjoy.
(Saint Saens's 'Carnival of the Animals')
-Paige.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)